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NURSES NURTURE NURSES DO NOT EAT THEIR YOUNG
Article Submitted by:
Eleanor Snyder
April 07, 2009
NURSES NURTURE
NURSES DO NOT EAT THEIR YOUNG
For too many years now nurses have been led by the stigma “Nurses Eat Their Young” Well nurses I am here to tell you that I abolish that stigma right here and now. Nurses nurture. We are not cannibals we do not eat our young we nurture our young. Women are nurturers since time began, whoever planted that stigma on nurses it has to come off and I am here to do just that. And to all you male nurses out there this stigma has been around since before the first male nurse existed. I am a firm believer that when you plant a seed in fertile ground, and continue to water it, it will continue to grow. That is what happened here and it has caused much damage to the nursing profession. Nursing is a God given vocation to anyone who has a desire to give selflessly to help others in a variety of different ways. I have been a nurse for 20 years and one of the first things I heard in nursing school was “nurses eat their young”. I pondered on it, and needless to say instilled a lot of fear in me throughout my profession. I wondered where this stigma came from and why someone would say something so damaging to the nursing profession.
The nursing profession is wonderful and if I had it to do all over again I would not choose anything different. Nursing is very stressful and demanding and requires your utmost attention at all times. We get pulled in many different directions throughout the day, to the point where our focus becomes distorted. Nurses have to know themselves very well and to know their limits. Everyone has them. Sometimes our level of tolerance has a short fuse, and we need to vent. This does not give us the right to devour our colleagues or our fellow nursing team. There is much accountability that comes with this wonderful profession and nurses it is time we re-evaluate ourselves, what we will and will not tolerate, how to manage out emotions, before we channel them in an unhealthy fashion. After all, nurses we are about health now, aren’t we.
As nurses we are educators as well. Just knowing this does not make any sense to me why on earth would we want to instill fear or anxiety into someone who is already a nurse or in the profession or is trying to become one. Nurses already know what fear and anxiety does. And for those of you who do not. It clouds your vision, distorts your focus, impedes your concentration and makes one feel inadequate.
The nursing shortage in the
Nurses Nurture.
By
04/07/2009
Nursnstudenttil1209
about 1 month ago
2 comments
i am a nursing student. I will graduate in Dec and take boards in Jan. I can say that there were days that i felt like this was a mistake and that I hated nurses. All because I was "shadowing" a nurse whom was 'eatting her young'. I dont understand it because I just wanted to help her get through the day and learn something. The only thing that kept me going were the nurses that truly care and took me under their wing. I have learned that the nurses whom take you under their wing and help guide you are the nurses that take great care of their patients and dont have dangerous short cuts. Where the nurses whom are 'eaters' do just that. Their patients complain more, they have short cuts that are dangerous and I would never want someone like that taking care of me nor anyone in my family..... neither should anyone else.
mrbrownrn49
3 months ago
68 comments
Men were the first nurses, lady. And men established the first organization of nurses with the Order of St. John during the Crusades. Men were the nurses up until 19th and 20th century wars began pulling them into military duty in numbers that prevented them from continuing to be the nurse. Then, and only then (a la Florence Nightingale) did women begin entering nursing or even allowed into nursing. You claim "nurses are women and women nurture". Horsefeathers. I have been a RN for 30 years and as a man I have watched numerous times as "nurturing" women chewed up another woman nurse and spit her out. Yet you close by saying this "eating" needs to stop. Yes it needs to but no it hasn't. Saying that something is does not make it so.
kellyfb
6 months ago
4 comments
I agree. I feel is is apart of each experienced nurses job to mentor new nurses not treat them as a bother or hinderance. Experienced nurses must bring up new nurses to fill our shoes when we are gone from the profession.
tamtam
6 months ago
16 comments
You've written about how things "should be", not how they actually are...In my 28 years of being a R.N., I have experienced a heck of a lot more "bullying" than I have nurturing by other nurses who were more skilled in a certain area than I was (at the time). The few practitioners who nurtured my growth in a spcialized field were more often than not, "allied health" workers, (for example, a wonderful OR tech comes to mind) versus another RN. There have been the rare ones (RNs) who taught me well without humiliating me and I can count them on one hand; they will also remain indelible memories of what has been good about my fellow nurses. However, it seems that the further I try to elevate my professional standing, with education, for example, I have been "shot down" by the very same faculty who are supposed to support me. I completed all of the core courses and all of the clinical courses of a FNP program-(with very good grades, mind you!) , took a medical LOA and was informed that I had to repeat everything again. When I once carried an "A-" in pediatrics, I was failed because they said that they didn't feel that I "belonged in grad school" at that time. What?! All of this on the "tail" of being diagnosed with ADD... Hmmm....but I had wonderful grades before I even knew that I had adult ADD...In any event, I've witnessed far worse "nurse-to-nurse" sabotage in my career. I am quite happy to say that I recognised it from the dtart and tried even harder to be a caring mentor. I am also relieved to know now though, that the "eating our young" behavior has finally been not only recognised, but validated with the terms of "lateral" or "horizontal violence". Given that nursing is still apx. 97% female, I wonder if it is a "female" problem of "bullying" versus purely a nursing phenomenon...
TheBeatGoesOn
6 months ago
46 comments
Dear Eleanor,
I believe we need to nurture also but how can we when we are being put out of positions for having compassion. When mathmatics out weighs compassion we are in trouble in Nursing today. When did we become so budget minded that care of patients should be possibly compromised? When the shortage of staffing has put such tremendous stress and strain on the
staff that they do the very thing you are talking about. I have been an unfortunate victim of such silly foolishness at times. How do we become the Nursing Field we use to so proudly profess?? I know we all know about the compassion fatigue syndrome. My question is, do the Corporations understand this? How can we educate them on the fact of shortage of Nursing Staffing, which staffing, is the back bone of their company. When it suffers, everyone suffers with it, including and foremost the patients. Is that not what drives this Quote-Industry of Health Care, is it not patients and their care? Let's all get on Board here and on Page together and be a Team again in every sense of the word. It's time now for everyone across the Board to take a much deeper look at what is going on out there in our profession. Come on Teams it time to take it to the Top. We are the Nurses of the Future of Tomorrow for everyone.
reikicw
6 months ago
4 comments
I agree that it would be nice to see the change happen, unfortunately I was a victim of the young getting eaten and it was unbelievable. NOT a situation that I ever put anyone else through but horrible to go through it myself.
Michaela68
6 months ago
46 comments
Well, I am glad I didn't know this before, because it might have stopped me in my choice to become a nurse. I am just starting my LPN training, and hope that I will have a better experience!
But it does sound a little like some older nurses are afraid the younger ones will take over. What is of course crazy, because we are here to help out the shortage on nurses. To all the nasty nurses, try to be more patient with us newbies, we are here to help!
nurz4life
7 months ago
102 comments
While I am all for the stigma to be erased hopefully forever from our profession; it is a sad fact that new nurses coming into the profession have to somehow earn their way into the inside crowd. Most, if not all nurses are unwilling to share knowledge that can at times make acclimation more easier for newbies. At the root of this fear is that we as older RN do not want to be weeded out due to Ageism or not being on top of our nursing game; oftentimes because of lack of resources, nursing shortage, or plain lack of initiative. Sometimes there is marginalization on the part of some nurses due to lack of diversity, racial intolerance, burn out, and inflexibility. I hope we can as nurses take responsibiltiy for our actions, take self evaluation to see where we fall short or may be in danger of contributing to "eating our young" and take active steps to be the change we want to see. Let us put the care, the pride, and the nurture back in nursing. We can do it! "Let start each day believing we can make a difference"!
bacnurse
7 months ago
2 comments
I am a mature, rather new nurse of three years, but I have to say that I have tried to flip the coin to see where it may fall as far as nurture or devour goes. More times than not...the coin has landed on devour, in one fail swoop. I am not sure if it is because I am a nure in my 40's and established nurses think I should 'know it by now' or if it has to do with the I had to walk in snow 20 miles barefoot when I was a nurse; you are lucky in that everything is on computer for you now." I would love to nurture myself, but it seems as if the nursing respect that I receive from veteran nurses is slim to none.
I feel also, that with the nursing shortage, many nurses are burning out and after giving so many years there are even more expectations by administration. You do not see the CEO's requesting a doctor to do two surgeries blind-folded, but allow a nurse to take care of 5-8 patients straight from surgery; no problem. Do not get me started on the ever-taxing Medicare documentation that has nurses more an auditor of one's health than that same nurturer that is spoken of over and over again.
Nurse's now are intended to be the business hand-shake as well for the administrators, especially in this economic downwind when less people are having elective surgeries. I am sorry, I did not go to nursing school to make sure that there was a mint atop turned down covers. This may sound a bit exaggerating, but I can assure you that one Magnet hospital I worked at would think nothing of writing a nurse up if the patient was not offered fresh sheets every morning, even if they needed to be medicated every hour for a fresh tib-fib fracture that still needed repair.
Nursing, to me is not all that I thought it would be. I wanted to be a nurse so that I could spend time with my patient and not have to worry about numbers crunching and who as a patient was a good candidate for sending back those silly, "How did we do surveys?" I wanted to be a nurse so that I could touch the lives of someone sick, a family member who needed consoling because their beloved was just diagnosed with a terminal illness, to hold a loved one's hand for ten minutes after their passing and let them know they will be missed. I did not want to be on a constant merry-go-round of looking for my PCT, getting one lump, not two of sugar before I even had an opportunity to see what medications they were on and what labs would be due and where they would be scheduled for the day. I just wanna love my patients, not worry about management's looking for any excuse to take me off their list.
catty0009
7 months ago
44 comments
lol justintyme......loved the catty reference there....but you are correct....and seems that the majority of the pushing around and terrorizing comes from the RNs to the LPNs.....I have worked with alot of nurses and the worst ones are those that cant touch a patient....the simplest of all the basics...just a simple human touch from those of us that call ourselves nurturers.......as I said earlier, I have trained many an RN, who knew the mere basics when they graduated......alot of the RNs seem to forget one thing...and that one thing is this: the majority of the strongest nurses in the profession are the LPNs.....we have a very strict and stringent regimen while we are in school.......if any of my fellow LPNs out there in cyberspace can agree, we may not have the full knowledge as extensively as the RNs do, but we are trained well......the best nurses in my opinion has always been those that are not afraid or too good to get their hands dirty.......anyways....I am sure not all will agree with me, but as I said, it is of my opinion.....but yes, I still do, always have and always will believe that nurses eat their young.....for as I said, alot of them have forgotten what it was like when they first started out and it is like a snowball's effect that most likely started when they themselves were in nursing school.......I, myself, was told that same thing right after graduation when I got my first job and saw it first hand as well as having to put up with it to this day........
jevwl
7 months ago
14 comments
I am lucky enough to work in a facility where all the nurses love their jobs, work together and nurture their few young. I remember the way I was hurt when I started nursing and I hope I never allow that to happen to any new nurse around me. If they got through nursing school and passed the boards they must really want to be a nurse and, frankly, I need the help. But I imagine it still happens where tempers are frayed, patience is exhausted and lots of baggage is being hauled around. It's too bad it's self perpetuating. Maybe the next generation?
justintyme
7 months ago
12 comments
Over the past weeks this seems to be the most commented upon and read "hot topic" Maybe this is an area that all nurses need to re-examine their own priorities, values, ethics, etc. in order to "get their poop in a group" so that they are recognized as professionals rather than a bunch of catty B%^*&*'s who continue to have a shortage of help.
bes
7 months ago
2 comments
hahhaha, the way a student nurse acts when she/he will be professional is greatly affected by his/her experiences when still a student. that is why it is truly very important to nuture our youngster in a good way while they are still young. or else, they will be eating each other.
PAOR
7 months ago
4 comments
"I have been in nursing for 10 years and I am tired of getting Pushed and I mean PUSHED around by fellow nurses and administration. I report it to HR and they don't care or try and turn it around on you. It seems that the only way you get repect is to be loud, obnoxious, and act like a B*tch. Then no one will mess with you. I see this in Aide all the way to BSN. Other countries have laws on work place bullying. USA does not.
catty0009
7 months ago
44 comments
I myself have been the victim of being devoured....from a super that I had always admired until I saw her true colors....it is VERY true that nurses do eat their young...and it doesnt matter who you are.....I have been a nurse for the past 14 1/2 yrs myself and have moved around very little in my job experience and career....I have been threatened myself, I have also had my kids threatened by the same super....I dont condone any of it....everyone is aware, but due to the fact that she is a super, nothing has been done....for those in management always stick together.....I have stayed in the same job for it is my patients I am there for, not for the rest of the supers that think they can play God......I have wanted to give up so many times but choose not to, for I truly enjoy what I do.....I have told myself tho that if I should ever get out of nursing, I would have a tie in it still for I will complete my education and get my RN, then work closely with an attorney to do consultation work.....I have seen blatant neglect from other nurses, even turned them in, and saw nothing done......I have trained many new grads and helped them gain the knowledge that I have to help them, not to hurt them......but it isnt like that with everyone.....yes, there are nurses that I dont think need to be nurses for they have forgotten the basics of why we have chosen the career we have.....and I agree, that if everyone will sit back and examine themselves, they might gain the insight as to why we all chose this profession and stop trying to hurt the new grads or those that have been in the field less time that we have ourselves...........thanks for listening....and to those that care, I am in the field of working with those that are mentally challenged.....