GAMES FOR WHEN
>WE ARE OLDER
1.. Sag, you're
2. Hide and
3. 20 questions
>shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the
5. Red Rover,
>Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over.
7. Simon says
>- something incoherent.
8. Pin the
>Toupee on the bald guy
>SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE :
1.. You sell
>your home heating system at a yard sale.
2. You have
>to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them.
3. You change
>your underwear after a sneeze.
>OLD IS WHEN:
>bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
>don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go a long.
>a little action means you don't need fiber today
>lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
5. An all-nighter
>means not getting up to pee!
>Thoughts for the weekend:
>be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctr- Alt-
>Delete' and start all over?
>children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called
>come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.
>to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural
>When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable
>plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it was a valuable
>way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
Have you noticed
>since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like
>they used to?
>60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird
>and people take Prozac to make it normal.
How is it
>one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start
>the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly
>things here and drink whatever comes out?'
>the first person to say, 'See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next
>thing that comes outta its butt.'
Why does your OB-GYN
>leave the room when you get undressed if he's going to look up there anyway?
>Of All, Remember!
A Good Friend
>Is Like A Good Bra: Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close
>To Your Heart!
Do you ever wonder
>why you gave me your email address?
> Never take
> life seriously.. Nobody gets out alive anyway!