Your favorite patient “lines” revealed!

 

I like when patients ask for their nausea medicine while eating a cheeseburger and fries and requesting a second tray from food service.

 

 

“I’m allergic to 25 mg Demerol, but I can take 50.”

 

 

When patients with severe acid reflux ask, “What do you mean I can’t have pizza? What else am I supposed to eat?”

 

 

On their 100th visit for treatment: “How long is this going to take?”

 

 

“I’m not obese—my clothes are shrinking!”

 

 

I love when the elderly patients use their call bell for something and say, “I’m sorry if I woke you up….”

 

 “Can I borrow $300? I promise to pay you back. You’re a nurse, you look like you make good money.” (Awkward!)

 

 

“I have end-stage fibromyalgia and need refills on my two narcotics.”

 

 

“I get redneck syndrome from that antibiotic.”