Overheard from the nurse’s station
Sometimes the things you hear on your shift are funnier than any sitcom on TV!
Nurse 1: That patient needs P.T.
Nurse 2: The physical therapist was just in to see him.
Nurse 1: No, not that kind of P.T., I mean pillow therapy.
Nurse 2: What’s that?
Nurse 1: When you place the pillow firmly over the patient’s face!
2. The KILLING FIELD
A deceased resident’s family member brought in a live plant and asked if we would like it. My co-charge nurse responded, “No way. We kill things here.” She immediately realized what she said, but the family member didn’t catch it. We still laugh about that one.
Patient’s wife: The nurse just went in to seduce my husband.
(She meant “sedate”!)
4. VISITATION RIGHTS
Patient: (to home health nurse) No, I don’t want you to come for a visit today.
Nurse: Oh, why?
Patient: I don’t feel good!
5. THE BODY ELECTRIC
Patient: Nurse, my electric lights aren’t on!
(He meant “electrolytes.”)
6. MY SON HURTS!
Dad: (pointing to his little boy’s genital area) It hurts him down there.
Nurse: Do you mean his testicles hurt?
Dad: Yeah, and his balls hurt, too.