Funny Medical Abbreviations For Doctors

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•ABITHAD - Another Blithering Idiot – Thinks He’s A Doctor.

•AMYOYO Syndrome – Alright, Motherfu**er, You’re On Your Own

•ADR – Ain’t Doin’ Right.

•AGMI – Ain’t Gonna Make It

•ART – Assuming Room Temperature (recently deceased).

•ATS – Acute Thespian Syndrome (the patient is faking illness)

•ATSWWT – Always Thinks Something’s Wrong With Them.


•CBT - Chronic Biscuit Toxicity for fat patients.

•CNS-QNS – Central Nervous System – Quantity Not Sufficient.

•CTD – “Circling The Drain”. May also mean “Certain To Die”

•CTF - Cletus the Fetus.


•DAAD – Dead As A Doornail.

•DBI – Dirt Bag Index – multiply the number of tattoos by the number of missing teeth to give an estimate of the number of days since the patient last bathed.

•DIC – Death Is Coming, Death In Cage – used by veterinarians describing the complications of Disseminated intravascular coagulation.

•DRT – Dead Right There.


•EFT – Eleventh Floor Transfer (in a 10 floor hospital; refers to patient who is very close to death)

•ETK(T)M - Every Test Known To Man.


•Faecal Encephalopathy - Shit-for-Brains

•FDGB - Fall Down Go Boom.

•FFFF - Female, Fat, Forty and Flatulent.

•FF or FFY - Frequent Flyer – A patient who returns to a medical provider for everything.

•FLD - Funny Looking Dad.

•FLK - Funny Looking Kid.

•FOS - Full Of … Stool.

•FTD - Fixing To Die.

•FTF - Failure To Fly.

•FLGD - Familial lack of Genetic Diversity.

•FTW - Friggin Train Wreck (patient with multiple problems).


•GOK - God Only Knows.

•GFPO - Good For Parts Only.

•GGTG - Gomers Go To Ground (they fall out of bed or gurneys).

•GLM - Good Looking Mum.

•GOMER - Get Out of My Emergency Room.

•GPO – “Good for Parts Only”

•GTO - Gomer Tip Over.