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Posted 10 months ago
I grew up going to be one of several things. One was in medicine. I always felt the need to serve and help the sick, broken and disadvantaged. The need to aide in the healing process. Another choice was always in the missionary field. Here again is that calling to serve. Even in my 6-7 year old age group I knew that if medicine ended up not being my calling I could still serve, I was already praying for the sick.
My third option, came from my pap and grandma. God blessed them with the abilty to be the best cooks I have ever known. So, I could at least feed them food, maybe feed there souls but at least I knew how good a decent meal could make a person feel. But, here it is again. Serving man kind in some way was my destiny. This part of my story ends with an interview at college with the question being ask of me, "Why do you want to be a Nurse? and don't answer because "it's something you've always wanted to do".
I have never been afraid to die because of my Christian beliefs. I have had Bacterial Meningitis twice. We as nurses all know that this is usually fatal or leaves you with some type of deficit. Hearing loss, vision loss, memory deficits just to name a few.
My first experience with this illness was not to bad, even though for several days I was at deaths door. I was somewhere, so peaceful, a peace that I had never experienced on this earth. My second experience with this illness health wise was much worse on me physically.
I remember thinking o.k. boys, I need a trach...a "peg" is a good idea too. All of this was going through my mind lying on a stretcher in the E.R. but, yet hovering above my body from a distance. But, oh the peace like only once before was here again. So after leaving the hospital 2 months later with the trach and the peg I was left wondering why am I still here? Duh.... to help others in the cross over. To be able to help some who are afraid to die.
To fully understand that and be able to tell others of the peace and the end of their pain. That death in itself is truly a part of living. I recovered enough that I was able to return to Nursing, it took almost a year, but I made it. Physically, I was only able to work about another year, but oh how sweet it was to be able to help those about to die to know that there is absolutely nothing to fear from first hand experience.