Acute lead poisoning [a•cute lead poi•son•ing noun]

 Gunshot wound

 

Axis [ax•is verb]

 A question, as in “He always axis me what I want for my birthday.”

 

BiPAP [bi•pap interjection]

 “See you later, Dad!” in English

 

Biology [bi•ol•o•gy noun]

 Shopping

 

CPAP [c•pap interjection]

 “Yes, Dad!” in Spanish

 

Fibrillate [fib•rill•ate verb]

 To tell lies

 

Ganglion [gang•li•on noun]

 Mascot of a group of troublemakers

 

Histology [hist•ol•o•gy noun]

 When you’re booed

 

Ketone bodies [ket•tone bod•ies noun]

 Really fit people with high potassium levels

 

Lactose [lac•tose noun]

 Person without digits on the foot

 

Mast cell [mast cell noun]

 A jail on a boat

 

Rectum [rect•um verb]

 Nearly killed ‘em

 

Reflex [re•flex verb]

 Flexing a muscle repeatedly

 

Sternotomy [stern•ot•o•my noun]

 A teacher who is really mad at me

 

Subarachnoid [sub•a•rach•noid adjective]

 Under spiders

 

Vein [vein adjective]

 Conceited

Artery

 The study of fine paintings

 

Barium

 What you do when CPR fails

 

Cafe’-au-lait spot

 A great little coffee shop

 

Cesarean Section

 A district in Rome

 

Cilia   

 A girl’s name

 

Colic         

 A sheep dog

 

Coma  

 A punctuation mark

 

Congenital 

 Friendly

 

Dilate 

 To live long

 

Fascia

 A Nazi communist

 

GI Series 

 Baseball games between teams of soldiers

 

Hangnail

 A coat hook

 

Medical Staff

 A doctor’s cane

 

Minor Operation

 Coal digging

 

Morbid 

 A higher offer

 

Nitrate

 Lower than the day rate

 

Node    

 Was aware of

 

Organic

 Church musician

 

Outpatient

 A person who has fainted

 

Protein 

 In favor of young people

 

Secretion

 Hiding anything

 

Tumor

 An extra pair

 

Urine

 Opposite of “you’re out”

 

Varicose Veins

 Veins that are very close together

 

I think I now know where the phrase “laughter is the best medicine” originated from! What would you add to the list?!