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something stinks

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Posted about 5 years ago

 

nothing like stinkin' revenge
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods .

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.

Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked.
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.

Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........

And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!!!

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Rate This | Posted about 5 years ago

 

HAHAHAHAHA I loved it Talk about revenge and boy was it sweet

008_max50

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Rate This | Posted about 5 years ago

 

This is awesome....I have an ex and I would have loved to have done that. But, I am too nice I guess. Good thing I didn't read this while we were going through our divorce. My niceness might have gone out the window...or into the curtain rods!


A good man loves other. A better man loves God. A great man loves God and lives well among others! I miss you daddy!

Dsc04173__2__max50

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Rate This | Posted about 5 years ago

 

I've seen this before, and I've always loved it. You know, I found out that doe urine works really well too...can't get the smell out of anything!


Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, worn out and screaming "Woo-hoo"!!!

Dsc04173__2__max50

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Rate This | Posted about 5 years ago

 

I had an ex who took me to the cleaners. He was a control freak, was cheating on me right under my nose, took the house, the vehicles, and the business that @I@ purchased, and then decided that he didn't want to pay for any of it. I had collection agencies breathing down my neck wanting the more than $30,000 I owed. Needless to say my credit was wrecked for some time (I REFUSED to file bankruptcy), but it all got paid off...A LOT of hard work and determination to make it!


Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, worn out and screaming "Woo-hoo"!!!