That is bad and unprofessional behaviour. I'm sorry that this happened to your family. You'd be amazed at some of the crap I've seen! Both as a student nurse and as a patient!

Ridiculing actually sick people is beyond the pale.

Ridiculing drunks...on the other hand.

Marieke - I was not meaning to say that alcoholism is not a disease. I have had several alcoholics in my family, and I understand it. These people come to the ER or to urgent care all the time and take up time that we could use to help others. I mean where does personal responsibility come int? I'm sorry but some patients ARE more deserving than others.

This is much too obtuse a topic to use words like "deserve". The immense scope of patients that come into an ED is just too broad. Some patients "require" more attention than others...not necessarily "deserve" it. The guy that came in today because he was a little hard to wake up after taking about 40 lortab (which is his usual, self-prescribed dose) amongst other drugs "required" quite a bit less attention than my patient next door who kept going asystolic. Does the drunk driver in Trauma 1 "deserve" the same care as the patient he just turned into a widower who is being treated in Trauma 2? Ease up on NevadaRN...this is a place to vent as well isn't it.

i have seen this happen so frequently where i work. some people have NO business being in this profession. it's beyond rude to laugh at a patient. try putting yourself in their shoes.

To NevadaRN - You better pray you never find yourself in a situation where someone has to decide if you "deserve" their assistance...

I belive that I would have actually have had to say something right then and there to the "nurse". Many people can pass tests....it does not mean they should be a nurse...maybe doing forensic nursing or research or better yet....work with the sharke!

I am sorry it is just not right for someone to be insensitive and make fun of or laugh at someone. Every person has feelings no matter what state they are in or what happens or what they do a professional should not laugh at them. It is rude and inconsiderate.

First off, I don't know what is so funny about an incontinent episode -either for the patient or the person cleaning her up. You just clean the person up and go on about your business. Hopefully, in the process, you can talk to the patient and make her feel less embarassed. Isn't that what a health care PROFESSIONAL is supposed to do?

I also have to agree with Charlita. I hate calling patients "honey" or "sweetie". In my experience with old people, they prefer to be called mister or misses.And , as a patient, I never let anyone call me that.

I know it is easy sometimes to think of some patients as more deserving than others. However,they all deserve the same caring attention. That is hard to do sometimes- separate our personal feelings from our professional ones.Because we are human. But, being the caring people that we are supposed to be, we MUST separate them.

Personally, I would like to think that I could care for a serial killer or a child molester the same way that I could care for anyone else. And then go home and have my opinions.

But, in all honesty, how can I say I would do something a certain way when it hasn't even come up yet?I can only hope I can be as professional in practice as I am in theory if that situation ever should arise.

everybody makes fun a patient every now and then....it's normal, sometimes funny, and sometimes it's just a processing thing

tdage: that's what being a nurse is all about! And if you don't feel this way-then you shouldn't be a nurse! I'm curious as to why you included obese or not? That doesn't have anythnig to do with any of it.

snowman said:

everybody makes fun a patient every now and then....it's normal, sometimes funny, and sometimes it's just a processing thing

I control and set the tone of the patient care through modeling the behavior and setting the bar high.
I have no problem telling a care team member to "leave" the room and "now". Once ejected they are not forgotten.
Later I approach with a professional tone and grip the words "that could be your brother, mother, you" and "I would protect you, clean you, care for you, defend you in the same manner" and wrap it up with "I expect great things from you". When I have to ask for assistant I have a top of the list "fast, accurate, knowledgeable, skilled, strong" selection. One would think that I would get the "B*****H" reputation, but I have found the opposite to be true. They return and stand in the doorway observing my skills for cleanliness, and observing sterile barrier. I enourage good work habits, retrain if necessary. Saying "I expect great things from you, I see your potential" erasses the error board and we can move forward with a clean slate. Forgiveness is Healing. I have no problem privately stating "if you are right, I will stand beside you 110% if you are wrong I will strike the match to light the fire under you". I have gained a reputation of respect and confidence with the staff, patients, and their families.
SET THE EXAMPLE and other sw i l l follow. It's out repsonsibility.

tdage: OK- I see where you're coming from. Thaanks for clarifying.

I have lived and worked as an RN (with advanced certification) for 33 years in the Deep South and must tell you that calling a patient 'honey', 'darlin', sweetie, etc. is part of the culture down here in the rural areas especially among the elderly and is NOT considered an insult.  In fact, sometimes it is necessary to get a patient to cooperate with the care that they need or to get information critical to their health care history.

Most people in these areas do not comprehend 'medicalese' as a second language and we must interpret so that they understand exactly what the doctor meant by...(fill in the blank).

I once had a patient, an elderly female who had some type of pelvic cancer.  The MD was asking her if she had ever had a 'hysterectomy' or had her 'uterus' out, etc.  She did not understand any of it.  Finally I said: "Honey, have you still got your WOMB?" and she replied "Oh, no! That was gone years ago!"

Keep in mind your patient and his/her geocultural environment.  Your body language and tone of voice means more than what you actually say in many situations. 

Sometimes even a little humor helps: A surgeon was trying unsuccessfully to insert a central venous catheter in a very tense patient who could not relax even as he told her it was just a 'little prick'.  I was assisting and said "Girl, the last time a doctor told me that I was having just a 'little prick' it weighed 8 lbs. 15 oz.!"  She laughed, relaxed and he was able to insert the line without further ado. 

Not everything must be politically correct, or even wise.  But when done in the worst of situations with the best and kindest of effort, sometimes a little 'off the wall' comment or laugh can make the whole thing better for everyone.  And most patients can use a good laugh now and then-even it it is to laugh at themselves.  I know I have as a patient.