Dear Tech Support, 

Last year, I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a 

distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the 

flower and jewelry applications (which operated flawlessly under

Boyfriend 5.0). In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other 

valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and 

then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf 

Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply 

crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these 

problems, but to no avail. What can I do? 


Signed, 


Desperate 


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Dear Desperate,


First, keep in mind Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package while 

Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command:

ithoughtyoulove dme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 (and don't forget 

to install the Guilt 3.0 update). If that application works as 

designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the application 

Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above 

application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, 
Happy Hour7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad 

program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO 

NOT install Mother-In-Law 1 .0 (It runs a virus in the background that

will eventually seize control of all your system resources.) Also, do 

not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported

applications and will crash Husband 1.0 In summary, Husband 1.0 is a 

great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new 

applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to 

improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot 

Lingerie 7.7 


Good Luck, 


Tech Support

that is very cute...

so funny!   what about trading it in for a newer model ?